I give myself grace as I navigate widow brain, trusting that every forgetful moment is a step toward healing and renewed clarity.” - Rebecca Ann

Introduction:

Have you ever found yourself putting the milk in the cupboard instead of the fridge and wondering, “What is going on with me?” Well, you’re not alone! If you’ve experienced that confusing fog after loss, you might be dealing with what’s lovingly known as widow brain. It’s that temporary, fuzzy mental state where you feel like your mind has packed up and left the building—like you're running on autopilot, but nothing's working quite right. So, why does this happen? And how can we navigate these forgetful moments without adding stress to our already full plates? Let’s dig into widow brain (and, you know, maybe check on that milk in the cupboard).

Episode 6: Widow Brain

Grief Plays Tricks on Your Brain

First things first: widow brain isn’t about losing your mind (even though it sometimes feels that way). Grief plays serious tricks on our brains, leaving us feeling foggy, scattered, and like we’ve misplaced our sanity right along with our keys. When you’re grieving, your brain is working overtime just to process everything. It’s as if you’ve got 100 browser tabs open, all running slow, and you can’t seem to find the one playing the sad music.

If you’ve ever put the laundry detergent in the fridge or found your phone in the microwave (yes, it happens!), you’ve been there. Widow brain can be frustrating and confusing, but it’s also completely normal.

Why Did I Just Put the Milk In The Cupboard

Why did I just put the milk in the cupboard? It’s a question we’ve all asked ourselves at some point after loss. It’s easy to get caught up in automatic actions when your brain is overloaded with grief. You’re on autopilot, but the system isn’t running smoothly. Tasks that used to be easy—like putting away groceries or remembering where you parked—become mental gymnastics.

The good news? Widow brain is temporary. It's your brain's way of processing trauma and loss. Right now, it's busy focusing on survival, which means some everyday tasks might slip through the cracks.

Give Yourself Grace

If you find yourself asking, “Why did I just put the milk in the cupboard?” for the third time this week, give yourself grace. Your mind is healing just as much as your heart. Widow brain is a sign that you’re doing the hard work of grieving, and that’s not something to beat yourself up over.

Laugh off those moments when you find your remote in the freezer or call the dog by your late partner’s name. Widow brain doesn’t define you, and it certainly won’t last forever. The key is to be kind to yourself in these moments and not add guilt to the pile.

How to Cope with Widow Brain

When widow brain strikes, take a deep breath and laugh it off. You’re doing the best you can. It helps to write things down, make checklists, or set reminders on your phone to keep track of what needs to get done. And, most importantly, be patient with yourself. If you’re asking, “Why did I just put the milk in the cupboard?” again, remember that this fog will lift.

You're Not Alone

Every widow has had her “why did I just put the milk in the cupboard?” moment. It’s part of this wild, unpredictable journey of grief. But the good news is, you’re not stuck in this fog forever. Widow brain is a temporary side effect of the healing process, and eventually, the mental clouds will clear.

Until then, give yourself permission to laugh at the ridiculous moments and know that you’re doing just fine—even if the milk ends up in the cupboard from time to time.

This Weeks Actionable Step

When Widow brain fog hits, grab a pen and paper and write everything down. Your brain is busy protecting you, but it might let those thoughts slip away in just 5 minutes. Jot down to-do lists, reminders, and ideas as soon as they pop into your head to keep your day on track.

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